Airplane etiquette: the golden rules for a relaxed flight

A flight is an odd situation: strangers sit shoulder to shoulder in a tube for hours, sharing armrests, overhead bins and a single toilet. A little airplane etiquette makes the difference between a relaxed flight and an exhausting one – for you and everyone around you. We travel a lot, from short hops around Europe to long-haul flights to Asia, the Americas and Africa. These are the rules that have worked for us.

Why does behaviour on board matter at all?

Because it’s about more than politeness. According to the European Union Aviation Safety Agency (EASA), a flight within the EU faces a safety threat from disruptive or aggressive passengers every three hours, and at least 70 per cent of these cases involve aggression. At least once a month, a situation escalates so far that a flight has to divert. The airline association IATA recorded one reported incident for every 480 flights worldwide in 2023.

The good news: most conflicts start with small things – a reclined seat, an armrest, a loud video. And those are easy to avoid with a few simple rules.

Boarding: how to do it without blocking the aisle

Boarding is where most of the jams happen. A few things help everyone:

• Wait for your boarding group. Pushing ahead only means standing longer on the jet bridge.
• Grab everything you’ll need during the flight – headphones, charger, passport – before you lift your bag into the bin.
• Step into your row while you stow your bag, so people behind you can keep moving.
• Ask if you need help, and help others if someone is struggling with a suitcase.

Who owns what? Overhead bin, armrest and window shade

The overhead bin

The overhead bin is for your main carry-on, ideally above your own row. Jackets, shopping bags and small backpacks go under the seat in front of you – otherwise the bins are full before the last passengers board. Slide your case in wheels first and more will fit.

The armrests

There’s no official rule, but there is a fair one that has caught on: whoever sits in the middle gets both inner armrests. At the window you have the wall to lean on, on the aisle a little space to the side. The middle seat has neither.

The window shade

The window seat controls the shade – but should be considerate. On night flights the crew often asks for shades to be closed so others can sleep, while many airlines want them open for take-off and landing.

Reclining: yes or no?

Yes, you may – the seat reclines for a reason. But how you do it matters:

• Glance behind you before reclining, especially if someone is eating or working on a laptop.
• Recline slowly, not with a jolt, so nobody’s drink ends up in their lap.
• Bring your seat upright for meals. It’s mandatory for take-off and landing anyway, and crew usually ask during meal service too.
• On short daytime flights, reclining often isn’t worth it.

Noise: headphones, phone calls and conversations

One rule with no exceptions: music, videos and games only with headphones. Speakers are off-limits on a plane, however low the volume.

And phone calls? In the EU, airlines have been allowed to offer mobile connectivity up to 5G on board since 2023. They don’t have to, and whether calls are allowed is the airline’s decision. If they are: keep it short and quiet, and ideally not on night flights. For messages and emails, on-board Wi-Fi is usually enough.

Chatting with your travel companion is fine too – just keep it at indoor volume. Voices carry further in the cabin than you’d think.

Food, smells and shoes

• Strong-smelling food (fish, lots of garlic, eggs) is better eaten at home or at the gate.
• Taking your shoes off on long-haul flights is fine – with clean socks. Going to the toilet barefoot is not a good idea.
• Feet belong on the floor, not on the armrest or against the seat in front.
• Go easy on the perfume: in a tight cabin a little goes a long way.

Toilet and aisle

On board, leave the toilet the way you’d like to find it: wipe the sink, put paper in the bin. Don’t wait in the aisle while the service cart is coming through, and avoid getting up while the seatbelt sign is on.

If you’re at the window and need to get up often, plan ahead: get up when your neighbours are awake anyway and nothing is on their tray tables.

The crew: why their instructions aren’t up for debate

Cabin crew are on board first and foremost for your safety, not for service. Their instructions – fasten your seatbelt, stow your bag, phone in flight mode, seat upright – are binding. Ignoring them or becoming abusive can mean the flight continues without you and, in serious cases, legal consequences.

A friendly hello when boarding and a thank-you when leaving cost nothing and make the crew’s day much easier. Alcohol on board is fine in moderation: it hits faster at altitude, and according to IATA it is one of the most common triggers of trouble on board.

Swapping seats: when is it okay to ask?

Asking is fine; expecting is not. If you’re seated apart from your companion, you can politely ask whether someone would swap – ideally offering an equal or better seat. Nobody has to give up a paid aisle seat for a middle one. Many people still happily help families with young children, and the crew can help sort things out.

Filming and taking photos on board: what’s allowed?

As vloggers, this one matters to us. A photo out of the window or of your own meal is no problem. It gets tricky with other people:

• Many airlines’ conditions prohibit filming or photographing crew and fellow passengers without their consent. Check your airline’s conditions of carriage – and if the crew asks you to put the camera away, do it.
• Publishing recognisable people generally requires their consent – in Germany this is the right to one’s own image (§ 22 of the Art Copyright Act). For vlogs, that means blurring other passengers’ faces or asking first.
• Security areas are off-limits, both on board and at the airport.

Getting off: row by row

As soon as the plane stops, everyone jumps up – and then stands in the aisle for ten minutes. A calmer way: stay seated until the seatbelt sign goes off, then leave row by row from front to back. If you have a tight connection, tell the crew before landing. There’s often a solution.

The golden rules at a glance

Situation	Please do	Please don’t
Boarding	Wait for your group, keep the aisle clear	Push ahead, unpack in the aisle
Overhead bin	Case in the bin, small items under the seat	Spread jacket and bags across the bin
Armrest	The middle seat gets the inner armrests	Claim both armrests for yourself
Reclining	Recline slowly, upright for meals	Drop back with a jolt
Media	Always use headphones	Speakers, long phone calls
Crew	Follow instructions straight away	Argue or ignore them
Filming	Only yourself, or with consent	Film and post strangers without asking
Getting off	Row by row	Push to the front

Tip: Pack a small bag for your seat – headphones, charger, water bottle, snack, jumper. Then you won’t need the overhead bin during the flight and nobody has to get up for you.

Our conclusion

Good behaviour on board isn’t rocket science: consideration, a little planning and friendliness towards the crew and your neighbours usually do the trick. And if someone still won’t share the armrest – call the crew rather than escalating yourself.

How to pay most easily when you travel is covered in our article Paying abroad. And for inspiration for your next flight, browse our destinations and our videos.